I'll Be What You Want Me to Be...

Today I went to my cousin Colton's Homecoming. He did such an amazing job and was such a great missionary. He talked a lot about representing Christ's name and a phrase from D&C 84:85 which says, 'Treasure up in your minds continually the words of life." As he was sharing different experiences and his testimony, it was a huge strength to me. It made me think a lot about what I have faith in and how I am representing Christ's name. I had the desire to be better and to want to teach others the gospel. I am so grateful for Colt's example to serve a mission and for his strong testimony. The closing song was I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go. It touched me immensely. I still am worried about my future and what is going to happen, but as I listened to that song there were many phrases that touched me and that were answers to my prayers. "So trusting my all to thy tender care, and knowing though lovest me, I'll do thy will with a heart sincere, I'll be what you want me to be." I know that as long as I am trusting in the Lord that he will lead and guide me in the direction that I am supposed to go in life. I know that he knows what is best for me and will never let me down. My goal is to turn myself over to him and listen to the spirit on what I am supposed to be doing... and maybe just let things go as they come not stress so much!

Today has been 18 months since Devin has passed away. Not a day goes by that I don't think of him. I have definitely learned a lot over the passed year and a half. I am so grateful for my family and their great love and examples they have been for me. I am grateful for good friends that have helped me through this time. I am so grateful for my Heavenly Father for being there to listen to me when I felt like I didn't want to burden anyone else. I have gained a stronger testimony through this experience. I am so grateful for the memories I have with Dev. From going to London to car rides to school, to feeding sheep. I love that I still have those memories and can remember him. I can't wait for the day til I see him again.  I love you Dev! Families are Forever!